It is a relief to wake up,
cold lashes through the
lace. You peer in the sink
red pot, gold spoon, pink cup,
simmering by the sunrise.
The discreet clatter of a
soul unfurling.

A lavender fringe; you
blink, and it’s gone.
Replaced by gold.
Too soon, you think,
placing the jewels you
carried in your mouth
on the cracked dish.

Year of the Maiden:
like a coin absorbed
between velvet cushions.
Will you look for it?
The change is swift,
dancing as wind
rustling blossoms.

— Seraphina Dawn

I often wonder if what I am doing is the correct way to approach the world and construct a life.

Doesn’t everyone consider this at some point in time?

When I was twenty-six, I realized that I did not know how to think. I remember being in a bright room, brushing my long hair, when the recognition filled my body.

The energy was vital and forceful: it was a command that left no room for commentary.

The recognition of my lacking critical thinking skills was not of me; it was something greater providing the announcement.

This event left its lavender fringe in the halo of my self-awareness.

As a result, I have spent the last decade widening my perception through reading, writing, conversation, travel, and yoga.

Yoga is a physical and spiritual discipline that (for me) includes reiki, butoh, aikido, vinyasa, and kundalini.

Humility is the first step in training the mind—it is the process of admitting what you do not know and allowing new information to enter. What will I receive?

What to do with all the information? This is where discernment comes into play—the process of filtering and parceling all that you have into appropriate segments. What will I keep?

The final step is direction: where, how, and with whom you will place yourself. I am just beginning to cultivate this final piece. What will I do?

Everything before this moment was the dress rehearsal. (Repeat that sentence as you like.)

Sending you a blessing in the full moon,
Sera

Samana: one of the five prana vayus
Jayat: conquest, mastery
Jvalanam: shining, burning, blazing, fire

Meaning: By samyama on samana vayu, a yogi glows like fire and his aura shines.

• Light on the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by B.K.S. Iyengar

The Vayus are the five currents of Prana (life force, energy) that govern the body’s functions and movement. Va is ‘that which flows.’

Samana Vayu:
The location is at the solar plexus, where the third chakra resides. The direction of energy moves from the periphery to the navel center.

This vayu works with the digestion of material substances (food, water, air) and the assimilation of our experiences, emotions, and thoughts.

The main place I feel sick is in my guts. When I am out of sync with my Soul, my belly tells me.

I had a lot of new/unknown events to move through last week. On the surface, I was ready. I did all the things to prepare myself for what was to come.

Yet, my preparation did not prevent me from waking up in the night and purging.

My mouth was full of acid, my body was tense and hot, and my mind was screaming at me to do something to escape the disquiet.

I used to fight these sensations. I wore the cloak of a rebel. I resisted until I couldn’t control it any longer, and then I’d lean in and empty myself until exhaustion.

When I relayed what occurred to a friend, I wrote that this was a normal event for me—the purge. I accept it.

At that moment of midnight, my body needed to turn the bucket upside down.

Is this the correct course of action? Can I prevent it? What could I have done to recognize my unconscious angst—to draw it to the surface to witness?

Samana Vayu: ‘a yogi glows like fire and his aura shines.’

Every evening, I place my hands on my abdomen and work with white light. I lay in the dark and imagined my cells settling. I massage my organs with colors. I sing and chant until my body hums.

My guts are the gateway to the subtle body: the whispers of the Soul.

And I will create (more) space to listen.

Quote to F O C US Your Attention -

≌

When I run after what I think I want,
my days are a furnace of distress and anxiety,
if I sit in my own place of patience,
what I need flows to me, and without any pain,
from this, I understand that what I want also wants me,
and is looking for me and attracting me,
there’s a great secret in this for all who can grasp it.

— Rumi.

1 question to brew on:

• Where are you in the world? What does it sound like? What does it taste like? What put you there? Who is with you?